Transitioning

Transition. It’s almost become a dirty word to me. I’ve been stuck in “transitions” for the last 10yrs. Maybe longer but this particular one is taking its toll. We’ll get to how it all started 10yrs ago later but for now, I want to talk about the current one. 

It started about a year ago. It’s taken a few years for my pride to lesson enough to let people help me. Especially my folks. For so long my husband and I kept everything we went through extremely private and attempted everything on our own. Finally we let my folks in more. A little over a year ago my Mama was healed of stage IV breast cancer that had metastasized all over her body. That’s kinda how we got here. 

After her healing we slowly let them in more of how much I am struggling with my health. They stepped up, not only because she was better but in the year she was sick I found how much I love them and enjoyed their presence. That old saying that, you’ll hate your parents from around 14-22 is true. But if you’re fortunate enough they can become your closest friends and comfort. 

Now, about 5-6yrs ago my parents had become snowbirds. Spending 3-4 months at the ocean from Dec-March. This was good. We enjoyed the visit we would take down during this time. Before my Mama got sick, they’d talked about moving. That was a great idea, then. All that changed when she got sick, they decided to be snowbirds for the time. Then everything changed. She got better, I got worse. I needed and loved them being here so much. Mama on bad days just to be “here” and Dad taking me to all my doctors appointments because I didn’t need to drive. 

Then the last 8 months transpired. They kept saying they wanted to move to the ocean. I kept saying to do that they had to put their house up for sale. What was I thinking?? Lol. Their house sold within a couple of weeks and Sept 1st they were at the ocean. My latest transition started. I felt lost, my peace and joy gone. My husband and I were on our own again in this journey. 

Don’t get me wrong, we’re happy for their new journey. I just felt like things would never be normal again. Emotionally I’ve been holding it together with one bobby pin. It’s selfish, right? It’s just after almost losing her to cancer our relationships changed. I hate her & Dad not being 15mins away. The dog and I could run over. I miss my time bonding with my Dad. It took so long to get to this place with them. But I know God is still good. He will take care of me. 

For now, I’m enjoying the trips down to the ocean. Our relationships are moving to a different level. Plus I’m also getting to watch my youngest niece grow and change on these trips and visits. I couldn’t be more blessed. 

Here I Am

I saw a post on Facebook earlier this week it said something like,

An old man once said....There comes a time in life when you  walk away from all the drama and the people who create it.  You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good.
So love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't.  Life is too short to be anything but happy.
Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.

That is how I am feeling.  This last year has been rough.
I'm sick of the drama that has surrounded me.
Sick of my reaction to it.
Unhappy with the unwanted stuff I have allowed into my life and my family.


I haven't posted in almost 2 weeks.  I've been "resting" (mostly sleeping day and night with the exception of the half days I'm working right now and the drive) doctor's orders, literally.  I'm on a trial run of 2 weeks, with the possibility of 4-6 total.  I think the whole reason I am in this shape  is because after so long negativity of "life" overwhelms your mind and takes over your body's well being.

One of the reasons why I went back to the original title of my blog, "Ramblings From The Foothills" because that is what I want it to be. Just me rambling about what I want.  Fun stuff, funny stuff, recipes and daily life that is not negative!  Not that it hasn't been, but "It Is What It Is" fit the whole "attitude" I had picked up.

Today I want to be washed clean.  Start a fresh with a fresh slate.
That is one of the greatest things about being a child of God, His mercy and grace He continually pours out upon us even when we continue to be hard headed.  

Slate is clean.
I am being refreshed.
Tomorrow is a new day and the first day of the rest of my life!

There Was A Guy

I met him my freshman year of high school through a mutual friend.

He was attending college in our little Podunk town. 

I remember the first time I met him.  He had a smile like no one else. It was infectious. 

He could light up a room with it, and make you smile when you wanted to cry or scream.

He quickly became a part of everyday life it seems.

Before I knew it 4yrs had passed.  School was out, and life began. 

He never left, no matter what. 

We saw lots of friends come and go.  Good dates, bad dates.  Funny stories. 

There wasn't one thing I would have ever held back from telling him. 

We shared secrets, hopes and dreams. 

He took me places.  Come got me in the middle of the night from places I shouldn't have been.

He talked to me in the middle of the night after my ex-husband left. 

We learned no matter how small the drop of Dawn NEVER put it in a dishwasher. 

When my Momma was sick with breast cancer, He held me every night while I cried myself to sleep. 

We cooked together, and played together. 

We shared inside stories and jokes.  

He taught me to love myself and how to let others love me. 

He encouraged me every day to do and be everything I wanted to be, never letting down. 

He was the first person I called when we found out I was pregnant.

He was the first person I called when I lost her. 

I called Him when they told me they thought I was in stage IV bladder cancer 2yrs ago. 

He promised He would be there, no matter what.

On Labor Day, on the way home from Indiana, I received a call. 

Jeff was gone.

I have lost my Dad, and an Uncle that was like a Dad, but it didn't prepare me for this.

DH had to pull over and let me out.  It had to be a bad dream, a joke. It wasn't. 

The next few days brought several emotions, but mostly anger.  

At myself.  For more reasons than I could list. 

I sit in a funeral home listening to a man who knew nothing about Him talk, wishing he would just shut up. 

I got more upset the longer I sat there.  It's the first time I wanted to hurt a preacher.  

I finally understood why people want to throw themselves or climb in a casket with someone. 

I wanted to shake him and wake him up.  Beg him to tell me it wasn't true.

I kissed him "hello" when I came in and "good-bye" going out, as to our ritual.

I went home, went to bed and started the next day as usual.  As well as the next, and the next. 

Then I woke up Sunday before last and that little routine was over. 

I have barely stopped crying since.

I know its not good but I can't make myself take his numbers out of my phone. 

Every time I see his name I want to call.   

DH is concerned I will never get over this.  

I told him grief has to come and it will go.  I am starting to wondering myself today.    

One of the last conversations we had was about time getting away and how we needed to make more time to spend together.  I was telling him how much I missed him and I hope he never doubted how much I loved him.  He told me not to worry He knew and that true love and friendships between people continues to grow stronger never diminishing with distance or time.  I sat on the bed and cried wishing the distance away at that moment. 

He is right.  True love & friendships never diminish.  They only grow stronger with time.  

Thank You Jeff.  

For all the yesterdays we had, and everything you taught me.

For the "secret" plan we had, we should have went through with.

For all the memories I have here with me forever in my heart & mind. 

For the friendship and love that will never diminish with time. 

I Love You, For Always,

Captain & Tennille

Today while at work I was talking to Boss Lady about getting a cd stuck in the cd player in the car.

The first thing she asked was, "was it your Captain & Tennille?"

I was like "WHO!?!?!?"

She didn't believe me when I said I had never heard of them.

That they were a duet, that was something like the Carpenters.

I had to question her wanting me to find out about them, seriously, if you think about it

what kind of brother & sister sings songs like the Carpenters??

She told me to go to my world of knowledge, aka Google and find them.

Being they had their first "album" in 1974 and was 2yrs before I was even born, I felt better.

So my question today is, how many of you remember this "Captain & Tennille"?

What are your memories of them?

For those of you who do, I have put them on my tracks below.

Enjoy!!

I thought this was suiting for me :)

Please Help Out!!

A friend of mine sent me this email today:


There is a child in my son's class who has brain cancer and has been fighting it for about 3 years now. One of his wishes if to have 100 twitter followers. He told everyone this a couple of days ago and we are trying to get people to add him to there list. They are in california right now with him to see a doctor there

I told B if he would send me the information or link, I can post it on my main blog, because a lot of those ladies twitter. I will be happy to share it.

So ladies, here it is, a little boy needs our help to make his wish come true!!
Please "Twitter" him. 
It is called THEJORDANLIGHT.

~~Thank You~~

The Trial

This is it (the last post) until AFTER all the Thanksgiving rush!

I start tonight on my baking.

Tomorrow night will be even crazier.

Friday I have decided to be brave and SHOP!  I think of it like this,

it can't be worse than being home with the FIL & Wicked Witch of Indiana, right?

Hope Everyone Has A Safe and Hapyy Thanksgiving!!

45 Life Lessons

Regina Brett's 45 life lessons with 5 to grow on

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don't ask, you don't get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

written by Regina Brett, Plain Dealer Columnist